Open letter to the people of Elkland, PA
Dear People of Elkland:
It's been almost a month since we visited Elkland for the Durk Sherman Labo(u)r Day Classic, and our team had such a great time once again that I thought it appropriate to thank you in writing for your hospitality. (Sorry I didn't write sooner, but I've been busy with this sport we call "hockey". You may have heard of it? Or maybe not.)
As in previous years, the people of your town welcomed softball teams from the US and Canada with open arms, and I just wanted to let you know how much we appreciate your hosting such a great event.
Though I couldn't possibly thank everyone individually, there are some people that I'd like to single out for their part in making this memorable weekend a success.
Staff of the Moose Lodge Chapter 988: Thanks for your fine (over)service. And to that one lady bartender that has been there every time I've ever gone, sorry for the hassle. It's not my intention to irritate you when I dance as I order my Yuengling. I can't help it, OK?
Ugo: Thanks for being a great announcer for all those games on the main diamond. I'm not sure if it's the whisky or the Marlboros or both that give you your distinctive voice, but whatever it is, it's working.
The Chicken Pit Crew: No matter how much I build up the taste of the chicken to the new guys, they are never disappointed the first time they try it. Whatever it is that you put on those birds and however you cook 'em, keep it up. Best of luck staying under the radar from the Public Health Department. By the way, what the hell is a "salt potato"? We don't have those up here.
Jesse the bat boy: Thanks for all your hard work over the last four years as our official bat boy. Here's hoping that things work out for you in the Army. Sorry we didn't get you in a game this year. If you make it back safely from wherever the service sends you to make an appearance in 2011, I promise you at least one official appearance as a West Carleton Electric player in a game at the tourney.
Grant: Great job on the Memorial Building, an excellent spot to honour your dad. Sorry I didn't get around to doing the "dance" you requested - maybe next time.
Muck: Thanks for being the only guy in the States that will drink Labatt 50 with me. (FYI, not many Canadians will drink it with me either.) To see how cool we 50 drinkers are, check out these two commercials.
Local Nacho Cheese Salesman: We were wondering - how is that stuff made? Actually on second thought, don't tell us, okay. Just keep on ensuring that the park's pump cheese vat is full every long weekend in September.
Dex: Great to see you and Ange, I hope you can get up here again next year and "have a few pints with the lads, for f_ck sakes".
The Shirt Sales Guy (sorry didn't get your actual name): Great job on the swag, some really good merchandise this year you had for sale at the park. Note for next year though - bring more selection of those press on numbers so guys can get their actual correct digits instead of taking whatever is left over.
Ricky the Ump: You're probably the friendliest umpire we've ever met. If you heard us calling you "Pinball", that's a compliment. With your build and demeanour, you resemble Pinball Clemons, a Canadian Football legend, as famous for his football skill as he is for his all around niceness. Anyway, one thing - if the catcher grabs the ball on a bounce, there's no way that's a strike, OK? Nobody's drop ball is that good, not even Alfie's.
Weird Al the Ump: Your calls were actually pretty decent, good job. But honestly, think about getting rid of the blond 'fro. Even a mullet would be better. (Trust me, I know, all of us hockey players had one at one time or another.)
Elkland Police Department: Thanks for your patience. And thanks for picking up our hopelessly lost right fielder who was wondering the streets of Elkland and bringing him back to the campsite that one night after the Moose.
Elkland Public Works Department: Boys, honestly, leaving pylons on the main street in Elkland during the Labour Day tournament? And you didn't think they would get stolen? Sorry about "borrowing" that cone on Sunday night, but it really seemed like a good idea at the time to use it to make moose calls on the walk back to the campsite.
Neighbours of the Ball Park: Sorry for the all the noise. And to the lady that we borrowed the fire pit accessory from - we didn't know it was yours, we thought it was just left there. In your backyard. For anyone to use. Anyway, our bad. Won't happen again. At least we didn't whiz on your lawn.
Mo: Good to see you big guy, hope your hip surgery works out for you in Buffalo. If not, I'm sure we could get you some public health care surgery up here in Canada. Might take a year or so though.
Jess (Mrs S, not the bat boy): Thanks for all the effort you went to in getting your husband his passport so he could come up here in July. You're clearly a patient woman. Thanks as well for being the only woman in Elkland with whom I am not afraid to dance.
Porter: (Note: Not technically an Elkland resident, but he does spend a lot of time there.) Thanks for convincing us to come to this tournament back in 2007. We should have listened to you years ago. That might be the last time you hear me admit that you were right about something.
Bill: Thanks for all your hard work in getting this tournament together. The tournament was excellent as always and the effort you put in shows through. You've become a good friend in a short period of time, and you are without a doubt one of the finest US Americans I've ever met. I look forward to continuing to play in Elkland annually for the forseeable future, especially some time in a decade or so when Seth and Fitzroy Jr and the Caveman are playing against each other in the tournament. Just one thing - if you could actually be a good host for once and throw the game next time we play you.....
Durk, RIP: Thanks for starting this thing back in the 50's and thanks having the vision to create such a great venue.
Until next September, best wishes to the people of Elkland.
kind regards,
Fitzroy Fastball
West Carleton Electric Fastball Club
Fitzroy Harbour, ON, Canada
It's been almost a month since we visited Elkland for the Durk Sherman Labo(u)r Day Classic, and our team had such a great time once again that I thought it appropriate to thank you in writing for your hospitality. (Sorry I didn't write sooner, but I've been busy with this sport we call "hockey". You may have heard of it? Or maybe not.)
As in previous years, the people of your town welcomed softball teams from the US and Canada with open arms, and I just wanted to let you know how much we appreciate your hosting such a great event.
Though I couldn't possibly thank everyone individually, there are some people that I'd like to single out for their part in making this memorable weekend a success.
Staff of the Moose Lodge Chapter 988: Thanks for your fine (over)service. And to that one lady bartender that has been there every time I've ever gone, sorry for the hassle. It's not my intention to irritate you when I dance as I order my Yuengling. I can't help it, OK?
Ugo: Thanks for being a great announcer for all those games on the main diamond. I'm not sure if it's the whisky or the Marlboros or both that give you your distinctive voice, but whatever it is, it's working.
The Chicken Pit Crew: No matter how much I build up the taste of the chicken to the new guys, they are never disappointed the first time they try it. Whatever it is that you put on those birds and however you cook 'em, keep it up. Best of luck staying under the radar from the Public Health Department. By the way, what the hell is a "salt potato"? We don't have those up here.
Jesse the bat boy: Thanks for all your hard work over the last four years as our official bat boy. Here's hoping that things work out for you in the Army. Sorry we didn't get you in a game this year. If you make it back safely from wherever the service sends you to make an appearance in 2011, I promise you at least one official appearance as a West Carleton Electric player in a game at the tourney.
Grant: Great job on the Memorial Building, an excellent spot to honour your dad. Sorry I didn't get around to doing the "dance" you requested - maybe next time.
Muck: Thanks for being the only guy in the States that will drink Labatt 50 with me. (FYI, not many Canadians will drink it with me either.) To see how cool we 50 drinkers are, check out these two commercials.
Local Nacho Cheese Salesman: We were wondering - how is that stuff made? Actually on second thought, don't tell us, okay. Just keep on ensuring that the park's pump cheese vat is full every long weekend in September.
Dex: Great to see you and Ange, I hope you can get up here again next year and "have a few pints with the lads, for f_ck sakes".
The Shirt Sales Guy (sorry didn't get your actual name): Great job on the swag, some really good merchandise this year you had for sale at the park. Note for next year though - bring more selection of those press on numbers so guys can get their actual correct digits instead of taking whatever is left over.
Ricky the Ump: You're probably the friendliest umpire we've ever met. If you heard us calling you "Pinball", that's a compliment. With your build and demeanour, you resemble Pinball Clemons, a Canadian Football legend, as famous for his football skill as he is for his all around niceness. Anyway, one thing - if the catcher grabs the ball on a bounce, there's no way that's a strike, OK? Nobody's drop ball is that good, not even Alfie's.
Weird Al the Ump: Your calls were actually pretty decent, good job. But honestly, think about getting rid of the blond 'fro. Even a mullet would be better. (Trust me, I know, all of us hockey players had one at one time or another.)
Elkland Police Department: Thanks for your patience. And thanks for picking up our hopelessly lost right fielder who was wondering the streets of Elkland and bringing him back to the campsite that one night after the Moose.
Elkland Public Works Department: Boys, honestly, leaving pylons on the main street in Elkland during the Labour Day tournament? And you didn't think they would get stolen? Sorry about "borrowing" that cone on Sunday night, but it really seemed like a good idea at the time to use it to make moose calls on the walk back to the campsite.
Neighbours of the Ball Park: Sorry for the all the noise. And to the lady that we borrowed the fire pit accessory from - we didn't know it was yours, we thought it was just left there. In your backyard. For anyone to use. Anyway, our bad. Won't happen again. At least we didn't whiz on your lawn.
Mo: Good to see you big guy, hope your hip surgery works out for you in Buffalo. If not, I'm sure we could get you some public health care surgery up here in Canada. Might take a year or so though.
Jess (Mrs S, not the bat boy): Thanks for all the effort you went to in getting your husband his passport so he could come up here in July. You're clearly a patient woman. Thanks as well for being the only woman in Elkland with whom I am not afraid to dance.
Porter: (Note: Not technically an Elkland resident, but he does spend a lot of time there.) Thanks for convincing us to come to this tournament back in 2007. We should have listened to you years ago. That might be the last time you hear me admit that you were right about something.
Bill: Thanks for all your hard work in getting this tournament together. The tournament was excellent as always and the effort you put in shows through. You've become a good friend in a short period of time, and you are without a doubt one of the finest US Americans I've ever met. I look forward to continuing to play in Elkland annually for the forseeable future, especially some time in a decade or so when Seth and Fitzroy Jr and the Caveman are playing against each other in the tournament. Just one thing - if you could actually be a good host for once and throw the game next time we play you.....
Durk, RIP: Thanks for starting this thing back in the 50's and thanks having the vision to create such a great venue.
Until next September, best wishes to the people of Elkland.
kind regards,
Fitzroy Fastball
West Carleton Electric Fastball Club
Fitzroy Harbour, ON, Canada
Labels: Elkland
posted by fitzroyfastball | 9/30/2010 08:32:00 pm
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